where stiles is a succubus afraid to kiss and feeds of the love infused in foods made from people that love him. and the sheriff is worried that he didn’t have time to make a loving lasagne full of love that his son will starve. so melissa bakes him cookies but she’s busy with work. so stiles discovers the hale bakery where derek pours his emotions into his food. and stiles is in love but dares not get too close because he fears he’ll suck the life from derek. meanwhile derek is conflicted because he’s also a creature of the night. scott tells stiles he should practice kiss to make it non-lethal. and stiles is like, I CAN’T DO THAT TO YOU SCOTT. and scott makes him empanadas filled with loving feelings and they play mario cart
Is Derek now Sarah Michelle Gellar? Simply Irresistible would’ve been so much better with a food emotions succubus. Can Derek have a crisis where it’s his mother’s bakery and he’s afraid he’ll have to close? And Stiles is one of his regulars, and, like, other Teen Wolf characters are also regulars, and maybe there’s a magical crab?
ORRRRRRRRRRRR what if this is a Particular Sadness of Lemon Cake situation, and Stiles has ALWAYS been able to taste people’s feelings through the food they’ve made, which is why he took over the cooking in his house as early as he could, because once you’ve had one grief waffle, you’ve had all of the grief waffles you need to have.
Everyone makes fun of him, because when given a choice, Stiles will always eat junk food, candy bars out of vending machines, frozen dinners from large, obnoxious companies who go out of their way to keep human emotions out of food.
He particularly abhors bakeries, family run numbers that smile so bright when they serve you a scone but then it’s all OH MY GOD HOW AM I GOING TO TELL HIM HE’S NOT THE FATHER baked right into every morsel. TERRIBLE. STILES CAN’T DO IT!! HE HAS ENOUGH OF HIS OWN PROBLEMS!
Except sometimes there’s just no graceful way to say, “no, lets not meet at that new bakery down the street, lets instead go heat up some hot pockets.” Sometimes Stiles gets dragged along and cannot get out of lifting a cheese danish to his lips, bracing for all sorts of unpleasantness and instead being overwhelmed. He doesn’t know what it is—it’s running on a different level than he is, he thinks. It’s intense, whatever, whoever made this, their mood. He doesn’t hate it, sort of likes it, even when he can tastes the flashes of anger, temper, a wooden sort of sadness. It’s still good, somehow. He samples the coffee made by Cora, likes her too, flirts with her until he finds out that it’s her brother in the back, baking. He’s got an entire wooing plan in mind, and it all seems like it’s gonna be okay when Cora slides a pastry across, says, “Taste that would you? You’ve got good instincts. My uncle made it and—,” but Stiles isn’t listening, he’s choking on the hate, bitterness, revenge.
Derek and Stiles from SecondStar’s Give Me All the Peace and Joy in Your Mind
Doodled this for SecondStar to cheer her up! I am really happy with how it turned out! :)
#professor hottie (via drunktuesdaze)
UHM i’m going to be needing a comprehensive list of all the sections he teaches in.
I’m gonna say FILM 346: The
Role of Impressionism in Post-war German Cinema
#professor hale goes on mini tangents when he gets excited#then gets embarrassed and apologetic#he knows they have a syllabus to get to#but anyone who wants to stop by office hours can talk further#stiles took this as a blow off class#but professor hottie is the only one gettin blown#HEYO
HEYO but what if stiles took it as a blow off class and then gets super into it and not just because he wants to lick professor hale’s beard, but because he’s genuinely interested in the material. at first he goes to hale’s office hours to pretend he’s struggling with finding sources for his paper, but professor hale is so earnest and helpful and he gives stiles all these books to look into, and it’s not like stiles can just not read them, no, he has to read them because he can picture the quickly-shuttered look of disappointment on professor hale’s face if stiles tells him he didn’t read the books, so he reads the goddamn books and it’s actually. kind of interesting? and pretty soon he’s getting all stiles-y about it, trying to absorb as much information as he possibly can, which means he’s in professor hale’s office nearly ever day for actual legitimate reasons - okay, yeah, he’s got a boner the whole time, especially when professor hale says things like ontological or auteurism or contemporaneous, but that seems to actually work to stiles’s advantage because in an attempt to cover his embarrassed arousal, he acts like a smart ass, calling hale out on everything, and in order to maintain his ability to be smart ass, he has to keep up in class - not just keep up, but get ahead of the class - which means even more time in the library and hale’s office, sometimes using hale’s office as a library because his books are way more relevant to what stiles wants to know, and hale doesn’t seem to mind when stiles just shows up out of the blue to sit on his couch and read in silence. stiles never takes the books out of the office, even though derek offers, until one day stiles realizes that maybe that’s derek’s super non-confrontational way of asking stiles to leave him alone. he feels like an idiot for not taking the hint sooner.
MEANWHILE derek can’t figure out why stiles stops coming around all the time, so he assumes it was just because stiles finally picked up on the creepy lecherous vibe that derek was putting out. it’s not like derek meant to get a crush on a student, that’s never happened before, but stiles is so engaged with the material and smart and clever and insightful and sarcastic and so breath-takingly beautiful and yeah whatever maybe part of the reason derek kept telling stiles to take some books home with him was because he liked the idea of something of his being so close to stiles in such an intimate way, and jesus christ he’s a fucking creep, no wonder stiles doesn’t want to hang out in his office anymore.
You know the question I had after Gerard first told me about our family. Why us? He quoted me Winston Churchill: The price of greatness is responsibility. Personally, I think it’s more about knowledge. What we know. The truth we know about the world.
people on tumblr who call me by my name are my favorites
hey guys-so i just spent some time reading some of the so-called ‘spoilers’ that are out there…please remember that these all are peoples opinion and expert guessing at best…unless someone has a script (like me) and posts a screenshot of it (not a chance in hell), then we really don’t know what’s going to happen, right? right.
we only have three episodes left…let’s enjoy them as they naturally unfold, shall we? spoilers are just that. they spoil. so just try your best to enjoy the show from here on out…
Bless you Melissa, you’re nothing but an angel. This is exactly what the fandom needed.
the D i v i n e Move
- I will place the finale